Epic Linkage Saturday

Welcome to another edition of Epic Linkage Saturday. Per usual, I don't always agree with everything that everyone I link to says. Just some food for thought from the blogs I was able to browse this week. Please post your own links in the comments section and let everyone know what you've been reading and writing about this week.


Adult Adoptees


"'Truthful' Narratives" at Neither Here Nor There
"However, telling a child that their adoption, "is not about them" because their mother"did not want to be a mother" is a good example of how adoptees must grieve not only their loss, but also the "narratives" told to them about their adoption, along with expectations they face from others of how to think and feel."


"She Just Doesn't Want Me" by iAdoptee
"I am certain that I’m not the only adult adoptee who feels stuck emotionally due to a natural parent who has dished out either a full-on rejection or the always life-affirming gift of conditional acceptance (Thanks Mom!). I am also fairly certain that I’m not the only adult adoptee who has avoided facing the cold hard facts simply because doing so is incredibly painful."


"What Type of Adoptee Will You Find?" by Elaine
"Over the years of being involved with adoptee rights, I have spoken to hundreds and hundreds of adoptees. Here are my thoughts of what a searching first mother may find. Many adoptees incorporate more than one of these features and some can fluctuate between them all. I’m sure that I’m leaving things out and I’m sure that not everyone is going to agree with me. "


"100 Years" by Von
"International Women's Day and the day to pay tribute to all the women who brought us here and those who are in our lives today.Time also to celebrate how far we have come, and while we still have far to go, our achievements have been steadily gained by our own efforts and by supporting each other."


"The New Generations of Adoptees Have it All" at Yoon's Blur
"Recently, as I was corresponding with a fellow, but much younger adoptee, I realized something that might have been obvious to many of you (but was not initially to me). The upcoming generations of adoptees in some ways face an even greater pressure to submit to the "gratitude gospel of adoption."


First Mothers


"When you find birth/first parents who have married" at First Mother Forum
"I heard something that other day that has been gnawing at me because it is the opposite of what I thought would be the case: biological parents who marry after relinquishing a child...are less likely to want a reunion, agree to contact and a reunion than birth mothers and birth fathers who do not."


Adoptive Parents


"Not the Work of Satan" by Veggie Mom
"I'm sure you've heard about the rumored slowdown in Ethiopian adoption.  (If not, you can read the article about ithere.)  MOWA, the Ministry of Women's Affairs, must issue a letter recommending the child for adoption before that child's adoption can pass court.  MOWA said last week that they would decrease the number of letters issued per day from 40 to 50 per day to 5 per day.  The basis for the decrease is to give MOWA time to thoroughly investigate each child's case."


"Anger & Adoption Books" at Adoption Talk
"Anger is the most socially-unacceptable emotion for both men and women, but for women it is even less acceptable. As the report of one study says: "A man who gets angry at work may well be admired for it but a woman who shows anger in the workplace is liable to be seen as 'out of control' and incompetent." And we've seen how the "angry adoptee" label is used to dismiss the concerns of adult adoptees -- we see anger as a disqualifier, as reason to disregard."


Donor Conceived Adults


"The 'Oprah Effect'" at Confessions of a Cryokid
"The fact that Oprah explicitly stated how happy she was to have learned of her half-sister and to have reconnected with her gave me at least a small bit of hope that perhaps this experience changed her opinion on the needs and desires of adoptees and donor-conceived adults to seek out their kin."


Happy Saturday! Don't forget to post your links!


I try to include a lot of perspectives in the blogs I link to each week. Adult Adoptees, First Mothers, Adoptive Parents, Adoption Reform / Family Preservation blogs, Donor-Conceived Individuals, Foster Care Alumni and blogs about race, privilege, women's issues, and feminism. A category, or several, being absent from time to time doesn't mean I am not going to include that category in the future. It just means that I did not get to read as many blogs this week as I would have liked to.


Photo credit: Salvatore Vuono