What does this story have to do with information-sharing in adoption? Simply put, it exemplifies one of many parts of life that makes sharing a story (any story) with others difficult—the intersectionality of our experiences with the experiences of others. In this story, one event simultaneously made one woman a mother for the first time and another woman a grandmother for the first time. Whose story was it? Whose news was it to tell? This story is an opportunity to look the merge of two stories without the stress of considering adoption on top of it.
Human beings are social beings and so much our stories are intertwined with the stories of those around us. It is the intersection of stories that causes curious people to ask our adoptive parents about our lives as adoptees. This is why “how much is too much?” has become one of the most frequently asked questions in the adoption community. This issue impacts each member of adoption in different ways. As an adult adoptee, I must consciously decide how to answer questions about myself, my immediate family, and my original and adoptive families. Likewise, fostered adults, original families, adoptive families, foster families all experience being asked something very personal and wondering what they should share or "how much is too much?"