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Showing posts from October, 2020


My Story: Before I was Adopted

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Content Warning: birth, birth trauma, separation, infertility, brief mentions of sexual assault. It was the early spring of 1985 when a 13 year old girl stepped off an airplane. Seven months pregnant, she had arrived to what was now her new home. Her sister lived here, in Tennessee. And she had flown well over 1,000 miles to her sister the moment her mother discovered she was pregnant. It is hard to imagine the thoughts that must have gone through her sister's mind, 14 years her senior, as she greeted her at the gate. The young teen carried with her only two maternity outfits and a few sample size toiletries. She had a story to tell, and her big sister would be the first to hear about it. I was part of this story. But it would take 25 years for me to hear it. This is the story of where I came from, and of how I got here. On this earth. I have written and re-written, published and un-published, this story multiple times. I was not finished with the blog post I wanted to publish toda

Vlog #5: How to Approach Adoptees to Build Common Ground

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In an effort to make my work more accessible on more platforms to more ages and media preferences, I can be found on YouTube and at my new podcast. My podcast focuses on providing a video version of new blog posts. And my YouTube vlogs focuses on updating topics I may have already written about and telling the stories about the time in history when I originally wrote on a topic. I hope to post a vlog every Tuesday. I will try my best. This week's vlog revisited an old post of mine from 2013 entitled, " How to Read an Adoptee Blog Without Getting Offended ." I discussed why I would no longer word the title of this topic that way. I revisited the original tips I gave with new information and examples. And I discuss an additional tip about how to value and appraise adoptees for their full humanity and not just for their parenting advice. If you liked this vlog, please comment, "like," and subscribe at YouTube. It really helps me out. To see daily updates and insigh

Vlog #4: Five Reasons Why I Searched and Reunited (Adoption Reunion)

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In an effort to make my work more accessible on more platforms to more ages and media preferences, I can be found on YouTube and at my new podcast. My podcast focuses on providing an orated version of new blog posts. And my YouTube vlogs focuses on updating topics I may have already written about and telling the stories about the time in history when I originally wrote on a topic. I hope to post a vlog every Tuesday. I will try my best. This week's vlog revisited an old post of mine from 2013 entitled, " Do we Really Know What Adoptees Are Thinking? 4 Reasons Why I Decided to Reunite ." I discussed this blog post and the 4 original "reasons." Then, I added one more. Can you guess what it might be? If you liked this vlog, please comment, "like," and subscribe at YouTube. It really helps me out. To see daily updates and insights from me, make sure to follow me on Instagram @amandatda --------

On Choosing Your Adopted Child First: the Abby Johnson Dilemma

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Have you ever wondered what goes through the mind of an abortion worker as they push through angry protesters to clock in for another day of work at a clinic? From accounts that I've read, they're dedicated to their jobs. They believe in the health care services that they provide to their patients. But the screaming and cursing; the threats that they receive. These factors may also play a role. People who go through “great pain, discomfort, effort, or embarrassment” to accomplish something will be happier with it than if the experience had been easy, effortless, and pain-free ( cite, page 18 on Kindle ). This was first discovered by Elliott Aronson, a student and contemporary of Leon Festinger. Most people who have had an introductory level education into behavioral science may be surprised to learn this cognitivist twist. That a punishment, such as screaming at someone entering their workplace, could have a better chance of reinforcing their job choice than discouraging it.  I